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February 15, 2007


Fred (aka NoJudge)

I'm Fred, AKA NoJudge. While I appreciate and applaud Eric promoting privacy, I'd rather adopt a more forthright tone in telling my story.

Eric's rendition of the events that transpired is accurate - minus some critical facts he omitted.

I told Eric that I don't judge people - unless they wrong me. After I met him at a club and he told me he had a crush on me, I never judged him when he replied to my initial e-mail asking who I was, although I promised to contact him. I also didn't judge when my first phone call to him was met with the question who is this. This was after I wrote detailed e-mails described the several occasions we'd met. No judgement was made when several people warned me that he is a player. Moreover, had I judged him after these initial issues, I would have not agreed to a first date, asked for a second date and tried to arrange a third date. However, my not judging does not give him carte blanche to engage in disingenuous activities in a public forum and expect no rebuttal.

I told Eric on the first date that, at age 27, I'd never being in a long-term relationship. I told him I hadn't met the right person yet. I have a history of meeting dishonest people, a category Eric described himself as fitting in this posting.

On the first date and through his blog, Eric implied that he dates more than one person simultaneously. I have no qualms with this action. My issue stems from his treatment of people when he decides that they don't make the cut.

Before the second date, which was combative, I asked him twice if he wanted to go out because he mentioned he was very occupied with work. He said yes on both times. Those were two opportunities he missed to tell me he was interested in someone else and to avoid feeling guilty about going out with me. Apparently, he didn't feel guilty about kissing me in my car when I dropped him off after the second date.

I never called him after the second date: I sent him a text Wednesday night and another Thursday. The Wednesday message implied that there would be a third date. Thursday's message, however, went unanswered. I wanted Eric to show that he was interested and reply to my communications.

Thursday night I went to a club with friend who was visiting from California. Eric approached me and complimented my shirt. Another blown chance at honesty. I then saw him talk to, make out with and leave the dance floor (and most likely the club) hand-in-hand with someone else. I would later find out that this person is his boyfriend. Eric, you weren't judged until last Thursday when you pissed me off. The verdict is you're an asshole and the sentence is a hard time, just like I'm giving you right now.

You were approached at the Kathy Griffin show because I couldn't trust you to be honest with me. Your selfish actions warranted the confrontation. I stand by my decision. As for attempting to earn a fan in your best friend, he is dating an acquaintance of mine, who was sitting next to your friend when I told him about the incident. You would have told him eventually. I just did it first.

Finally, I didn't post any rude comment on your blog. Like I told you, I would assign my name to any comment. I'm glad you realize that you were wrong to treat me like you did (Eric apologized twice), but I thought someone who presents himself as an arbiter of gay dating etiquette (he has the proper attitude on rescheduling canceled dates) would have better manners.

Telling me you are very interested in another person is a much more adult approach than using your blog to do so or pointedly having me see you making out with him at a club. Eric, I wouldn't be writing this had you told me about your other candidate last week. Your phone call came a week late. I highly doubt you would have called me Thursday had I not seen you at the show. You had five days to tell me what was going on and you didn't.

I'm glad you've used our experience together for some self analysis. You epitomize the selfish, negative person you berate on your blog. We're all on a path to self betterment and I wish the best as you embark on this process.



So now the real test: will Eric pull a "Frank" and delete Fred's negative and attacking comment, or leave it up in a brave show of tranparency?

I'll bet a shot of bourbon on the latter. Any takers? (And I'll bet a second shot on Eric writing a response back....lordy, this is better than watchin' my "stories"!)


NoJudge....did eric ever mislead you? do you feel the need to justify yourself for some greater cause or is this respose really intented to make eric contemplate the whoas of the world. bitch, i earned my nickname on this blog and if a queen in this city should be drowning in tears over this situation, it's me, but you know what...i like how happiness looks on my friend and i like how david fits in his clothes even better. you missed the ferry, fairy... so cry a muddy river or write a self-rightous wrong, but god damn it, to the original poster...one man's trash is another man's treasure so get used to this pocket gay celebrating love and life, because as obnoxious as it is, its better written than your copy and pastey ass, and will no-doubtedly last longer than your nicotine patch, and your 'talent'...to be brutally Frank.


omg Martyrboy, put down the shot. Put down the shot. Ha.

Also for background, guys, Martyrboy is the one who introduced me to the Cheerleader when they dated more than a year ago. Yeah, small town.

Zak, I sent Fred a private email response assuming this story was already getting boring for you guys. Most of it cleared up the chronology for him. The Cheerleader and I had the exclusive dating conversation on Saturday.


yea, that whole last part was to tha 'anon-not-so-anon' poster of the VDay Snow Storm comment.


tee hee hee, you guys are so freaking funny! Erik your blog IS the best!



Too bad i never got to hit that!

Hey Gurl!

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